I think my mental state of mind is similar to yours, I dont perform as well as i should in the local open meets and I’m inconsistent, but come the big (for me) competition such as English Schools, I really get hyped up because of the situation/nerves/’crowd’/pressure etc like most do – but i respond well to it.
I remember a feeling before the Schools final last summer, really hard to describe and hopefully others have felt something like this and I’m not just some weirdo; a sort of flowing or tingling going down my body, just itching to be unleashed once the gun goes. This was when waiting behind the blocks to be called in, it then started ‘flowing’ down my arms once in the blocks waiting for set. This was the only time I’ve ever thought to be myself ‘Oh my god, I’m going to run seriously fast now’
BANG! I was off. There had been a false start … the ‘flow’ had dissapated out of me and i didnt run as well as i shouldve in the final (big pb in semi though)